Dear Diary…Gerald

Dear Diary,

This is my third day in this house and I’m finding myself flying around more and more to keep myself from sinking into a depression. The mess those squatters left for me has driven me crazy, and the rats…they’re everywhere.

Today I woke up at 6:30am after an intense dream involving, unsurprisingly, rubbish.  There was also a computer, and a polar bear for some reason. I’ve never seen a polar bear in real life. I might book a trip up north one of these days.

I sat down to a lazy breakfast of juice (considering I keep burning the waffles I figured this was a safe bet) and took out yet more rubbish. Three days in and there’s still piles of stuff everywhere – the front yard looks like something from that TV show “Hoarders”. I jumped in a shower, mopped the bathroom floor (I really must get that fixed) and give Deirdre a call. She was one of the first people to come over when I first moved in, and offered to give me a hand to clean up. It’d be nice if we could hang out more.

After staring out the window and yelling at the rain for half an hour I figured it was time to get a job. I love helping people, so the medical field seemed like a reasonable choice. The only position available was for an organ donor. $22 per hour is not too bad. Act now, think later – I took the job. Then I sat there for an hour, wondering what I’d done. Hopefully I get promoted quickly – before I lose something vital.

I recycled the old paper out the front then flew around a bit to cheer myself up. It won’t be too bad. I’ve got a high pain tolerance. Things will be just fine, I’m sure of it. I decided to call my new boss, Lorna, for a chat. we spoke about work, computers…and rubbish. I flew around a bit more. I know I’m becoming dependent on that for my happiness but what’s a fairy to do?

I gave Suzie a call – I hadn’t spoken to her since meeting her that first day. We had a quick conversation about nachos, then I wandered into the lounge room to watch some TV – forgetting about the rats and rubbish in there. I can’t stop freaking out over this stuff. It stinks, it’s gross, and I just want it gone already. Damn squatters. I shooed the rats, cleaned up some of the mess and sat down to watch an action flick. I’m halfway through but couldn’t stop thinking about my new job. I really want to enter the medical profession, but do I really have to donate my organs? I called Lorna again. We ended up talking about my house. And rubbish.

I needed to get out of the house so I flew to the park nearby for a game of chess.  Jennifer Burb joined me for a match – we made some small talk about ladybugs, and how much she hates chicken drumsticks – then things got rather competitive. My logic skills were increasing by the minute, and I couldn’t stop playing. Tasha Dahl and Ava Kelly formed a cheer squad table-side. Come 2:30am Tasha went home. At 6:15am Jennifer finally passed out. I headed home – I haven’t chucked an all-nighter like that ever.

I had a quick drink of juice and climbed into bed at 8am. Luckily I don’t have to start work for another couple of days. I wonder what life in Dragon Valley will have in store for me.

Gerald Burlingame

I'm so sick of this rubbish


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